A FakeNews Special Report on Earth’s Impending Invasion—a “Leaked” yet to be published News Release!

Scientist’s say they’re probably a lot like us, but only if they’re from a place NASA calls a “Goldilocks Zone” located in some distant and remote corner of the universe.

The Extra-terrestrials or Aliens who slipped into Earth’s orbit a few days ago might not actually resemble us but they’re likely to have many of our failings; such as greed, violence and the tendency to exploit resources other than their own.  In fact they could be disturbingly like us, and you guessed it, that’s not necessarily a good thing – after all, we really don’t have a great record when it comes to getting along with folks who do not look and act a lot like us.  

While they could have come in peace they are just as likely to be searching for someplace to live or they may be hell bent on helping themselves to Earth’s abundant water supply and or our limited minerals such as copper, silver or gold. Regardless, their silence is rather haunting!

The broad based idea held by some “contact” enthusiasts believe any alien civilization capable of reaching Earth can only do so because they have survived long enough to develop the necessary technology to do so. Well, duh, that makes sense, but more importantly, this belief also contends that such far-away civilizations have solved major social problems, such as war, poverty, hunger, and discrimination.  Now, these folks also believe in the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny and they’re  sure that a Stork delivers New Born Babies that most any female can find in “Farmer Brown’s” Cabbage Patch.  This attitude also dictates that they’re friendly; a long, long way off; and they can’t get here from there. But then, with no warning, we awoke three (3) days ago to find  an armada of extra-terrestrial spaceships circling Earth . . . Sooo, the last part of that perception simply won’t hold water and we can only hope seawater is all they’ve come for.

From a historical prospective, the US space agency’s search for extra-terrestrial life has been based upon the concept of “Following the Water”, a strategy based upon the fact that, on Earth, where there’s water, there’s life. With this thought foremost in mind, you might want to take note that the Space Agency’s limited brilliance has determined that of the billions of stars in the vastness of space outside our solar system, only 400 or so actual planets are known to exist and only a few of those are situated in the – “Goldilocks zone” – where the temperature is neither too hot nor too cold for liquid water to form.  Point being, intelligent life is actually rare in the universe so odds are pretty good that the visitors zipping along above us respect that fact, but this FakeNews reporter is thankful that, within the United States at least, there’s still a Second Amendment in place.

In recent times, the most commonly encountered alien species is known as the Grey’s - so called because of the greyish color of their bodies. Several species of Grey’s have interacted with humankind in one form or another even before Earth’s “modern” era. 

On the other hand, the “Ancient Alien” theory of interaction with humanity has been suggested by various sources, both oral and written.  For example the Tengu Beings are found in Japanese folklore; they were reportedly horrific forest and mountain dwelling humanoids having the wings, claws and the beak of a bird. The Early Mesopotamian writings speak of the “Anunnaki” from the planet Nibiru and everybody’s favorite the “Shining Ones” who are described by several ancient cultures.

Then there’s the 5,000+ year old oral “history” that has been handed down by the Dogon (pronounced Doo-gon) Priests of Mali, West Africa to consider. Such history includes astronomical knowledge which the native people could not have learned by themselves or reasonably guessed.  But, of most importance, the Dogon’s speak of an alien race who called themselves the “Nommos”. According to the Dogon Priests, the Nommos were extraterrestrial inhabitants from the Sirius star system who traveled to earth at some time in the distant past. While visiting they shared knowledge about the Sirius star system as well as our own solar system with the early Egyptians, who, according to the Dogon peoples, are actually ancestors of the Dogon tribe.  

The Argument is often made by various governments that the good folks of planet Earth are far better served if they with-hold information disclosing the truth about intelligent extra-terrestrial life.  Sooo, as you’d expect not a single government, save one, has yet to acknowledge that contact has been made with the mysterious fleet of space craft currently circumventing planet Earth every 30 minutes; three times faster than a NASA shuttle orbits by the way.  In any event, the one exception to admitting “contact” with the mystery crafts is the Arab Republic of Egypt but they’re not talking beyond that point of fact! . .

Oh yeah, an overnight phone survey by CNN and Fox News both suggest most people think they’ll be fine, but they do worry about others “freaking out.” Sooo, if you’re considering freaking a bit, please, just remain calm! . .

Besides, what’s that old confusing saying? . . “When all’s said and done, what will be, will be” . . . Yeah, that’s it; well, that old saying really means its way to late to do anything about such things anyway . . . So, why bother with freaking out now? . .

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Can You Imagine That?